I’ve started thinking there’s something wrong with the way I think about myself. When did I learn that I should hate myself? When did I learn to disregard all the reasons to see beauty and value in myself? To see the talent, the lovely, the wonderfully quirky? To see myself as a friend who I would want to encourage and support instead of an enemy to hurt.
And, it makes me feel sad that my 10-year-old daughter is learning this negative self-speak from me. She feels terrible at times, with the way she looks and acts. If I change the way I think about myself, then, perhaps, she can learn that from me as well. I’m going to start today.
I’m starting a diet … but it’s not what you think. You gotta put all thoughts of food aside. This isn’t about food. It goes like this:
Anything that makes me feel good about myself –
START DOING IT.
Anything that makes me feel bad about myself –
STOP DOING IT.
This diet is simple and, I feel, might actually work. As you may or may not know, I’ve spent a lot of my life being critical of myself. The list of reasons I should dislike myself is large and isn’t based on anything really true.
My first effort will be a letter from myself to myself. A love letter. I’ll actually stamp it and mail it.
Whattayathink? Let me know. I’m interested in hearing your take on this.
This past month has been one where I’ve felt a little lost, even while I felt like I knew exactly where I was going. I did all the ‘right’ things; crossing all the T’s and dotting all the I’s but I felt a little empty and inadequate at the end of every day. Too much on my plate and no brakes to say ‘no.’ I was sorry every week to miss the opportunity to say ‘Hey’ to you guys.